Bringing up Bébé

Bringing Up Bébé: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting by Pamela Druckerman
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

**I'm updating this review to give it another star because I haven't been able to stop talking about, thinking about, mulling over, and agreeing with the philosophies I learned in reading this book.**

I came into the reading this book with a pretty firm understanding of how I want to raise my children. I was skeptical when my sister recommended it to me, because when I think of French people the label "not spoiled" does not seem to fit. But having just read French Women Don't Get Fat, I started to think deeper about how there is so much healthy delayed gratification in the culture of France. So I gave it a try!

So much about French living is that Le Pause that she speaks about in French parenting. I know I would do well to include such a pause in my own adult life. Druckerman does a fine job of explaining all of these concepts, which revolve around learning how to wait, and thinking critically about "educating" children to delay gratification.

When you break it down, it is basically the way that our great-grandparents would have preferred to raise children: adults are in charge, they know they're in charge, the children respect that, and the respect is mutual.

I'm giving it four stars as it's not a comprehensive book for me because it doesn't include faith in it (not a surprise), but I really enjoyed a lot of the takeaways I got.

View all my reviews

If My Moon Was Your Sun, book review (children's book)

Book review:

If My Moon Was Your Sun
by Andreas Steinhöfel | Nele Palmtag
Pub Date: 01 Nov 2017

This is one of those books your read to your child (or class) so they become more emotionally intelligent, while you, the adult, choke back tears. This book was touching because of the idea of a young boy loving his grandfather so deeply, but also in the way the character's voice was so distinctly 10 years old. Max is in that perfect stage between misunderstanding the way adults act because of his childishness and understanding the same scenarios more profoundly than even the adults. He was the perfect character to portray such a sweet story of love for someone he knows, deep down, isn't going to be around forever.

It's a longer book and would work well for teaching making inferences, voice, plot structure, and a few other elements. It's likely a story to which upper elementary to middle grade students might relate.

★★★★

Edison, book review (children's literature)

Book review:

Edison
by Torben Kuhlmann
Pub Date: 02 Oct 2018

Firstly, the illustrations in this book are gorgeous, of excellent quality, and highly detailed. Secondly, I love that there exists a passionate engineer-minded artist who wants to introduce these scientific ideas to kids in a children's book. The story is decent for a children's story, obviously enhanced by the illustrations. However, the word choice and lack of complexity in the syntax leaves something to be desired. It feels quite casual, as if the author didn't think a child could understand a higher level of vocabulary or less obvious conversation. I would rather a parent participate in the book with the child to help them understand (especially, again, with the help of those fantastic illustrations) than for the language and vocabulary to be dumbed down. I write this from the perspective of an elementary English learner teacher. Overall, I would like to have this book on my daughter's shelf because of the science and the illustrations, but I would probably ad lib some more interesting dialogue and vocab.

★★★

If, book review

Book review:

If
by David J. Smith
Pub Date: 01 Aug 2014

This teacher and art lover is elated that this book exists. Gorgeous illustrations match well with a creative display of scientific "what ifs" to make our world more relevant and exciting to young readers. This is an excellent book for your collection, especially for homeschoolers who are comfortable with the theory of evolution.

★★★★★

Blessings, Not Burdens

In the same vein of today's culture sanctifying busyness, we glorify our burden. If for a laugh, just to vent, or because misery loves company, so many of us play "my problem is bigger than yours" all day. We hear this a lot during our engagement:

"Just wait!"

"Welcome to the end of your life."

"You had fun while it lasted."

"Do you really know what you're getting yourself into?"

Over the months it graduated into begrudging bigger family life: complaints of crying babies, sleepless nights, jealously of free time, and other ways that good people wanted to commiserate about the burden of their family.

During our efforts to grow our family, we've encountered the gambit. Curiosity with pure intentions, desire for us to join them as Family People, warnings to delay it as long as we can, and general reactions about how uncomfortable a burden pregnancy and kids will be.


Stop. Please.

We'd gladly take your burden. I look forward to morning sickness. When my back aches at 8 months pregnant (God-willing), I will remember the emptiness of years with a pain-free back. During those sleepless nights, knowing we'll work hard to show patience to one another, Kevin and I will share countless grateful glances. This is what we want and what we know God is calling us to have.

Complaining about your blessings hurts our world and the kingdom. I wish I could share with you my perspective, not to unburden myself of the pain of infertility, but so that your might know the value of your sleepy eyes, full weekends, and occupied homes.

My Saint Claimed Me

January Prompt: Saints: Picking Them, Picking Us

Check out The Bright Maidens over at the Facebook Page! 

"I picked her and I literally have zero in common with her, except our names. And mine has an E," I told my husband less than a month ago, condescendingly patting my 17-year-old self on the head for my shallow reasons in picking my confirmation saint.

Image borrowed from this video. 

I went on to describe her life:

• Lived her childhood through the Revolutionary War
• Husband's formerly healthy business went underwater
• Husband died of tuberculosis after suffering through the disease for most of their marriage
• Family disowned her when she converted
• Raised five children alone
• She looks ridiculously depressed in virtually every rendering
• Eventually started the Sisters of Charity and helped found the current Catholic education system

My saint always depressed me, but what choice did I have? We had the same name, it was easy.

The first image that pops into my head is from a documentary I watched on her at some point in my life. She's in a dark room, kneeling at her husband's bedside, weeping as he passes away. Phew.

My shelf holds at least five books about her, though I knew I'd rather not share her trials. I held her at an arm's length, hoping to avoid more commonalities in my lifetime.

It took a wicked norovirus striking my married household and a PBS video to V8 smack me: She picked me!

Yes, people say that all of the time and I must admit that I've never had a strong dedication to one saint over another. I hardly tap that resource, aside from my constant pleadings for Mary's prayers. I'll blame myself for not seeking ways to answer non-Catholics' digging questions about our relationships with the saints -- instead of having to figure out how to appease the hatahz, I avoided exploring it at all.

Well, I was sitting on the edge of my marriage bed, trying to comfort my ailing husband as he suffered from a ridiculous bug and BOOM. That image of the first American-born saint with her tuberculosis-stricken husband rushed to mind.

I mean, she looks like a ball of fun. Source.

A few days later, I was in class, watching a video about the history of education in America when the era of conception of the Catholic school system played out in front of my eyes. A product of a Catholic high school, it never occurred to me why there would be a Catholic school system, except the obvious: parents wanted their kids to learn Catholic-ness in school.

No, it was because the only free schools for immigrant, Irish (and Italian, Polish, German, etc) children were unabashedly racist against those from the Emerald Isle and extremely anti-Catholic. This is why it's such a big deal that my saint is the patron of Catholic schools: immigrants who wanted their children to learn the faith despite poverty and sincere anti-Catholicism.

She sought me out. I have basically ignored her my entire life as books of her life sat on my shelf, so you can hold onto your arguments of the power of suggestion. She has been far out of my mind for years.

As a recently married grad student currently earning my masters in teaching elementary education and English Language Learners, I'm grateful to finally acknowledge one of the great ladies who has been praying for me throughout my life.

Arr'ray Pottah - 7QT, Volume 37

Click here to read the original post at ConversionDiary.com

*1*

I have to be awake in 4 hours for work... because I just got home from watching my childhood end.

I saw the final chapter of Harry Potter close onscreen tonight (this morning?). I am grateful, as my sisters said, that the books will always be there, preserved, for me to read.

*2*

This is the first midnight showing I attended and as it was the final opportunity, I had to dress up! I have more photos than this and I will post them after I sleep, but here I am in my car mirror.

... oh no wait, that's Rita Skeeter after she went brunette (you didn't know she went brunette? You must have missed that part of the book...)

UPDATE: I was not happy with most of the pictures we took before going to King's Cross, I mean, the movie theater, so I only have this photo of my sisters (Hermione and Tonks). Tonks is doing her pig nose, obviously:

*3*

The rest of this 7QT will be quotes from my sisters chronically quotable nannyees (those kids whom she nannies). All names have been changed:

My sister and the kids were talking about getting shots at the doctor.

Hermione (what? I'm sticking with a theme, here): "One time I had a shot and it felt really good."

Ron: "It couldn't feel as good as a hot dog would feel. Or a piece of pizza."

*4*

Friend from pool, Harry: "Have you ever been to the solar system?"

My sister: "No I've never been."

Harry: "Well, I'm going to go one day, I just have to pick a day."

Harry walks away.

Ron: "I'm going tell him that he needs to wait until he's a grown up because he might forget his oxygen suit."

*5*

Hermione: "What if your nose is underneath of your mouth?"

*6*

About an 80-year-old woman at the pool with notoriously healthy-sized teeth:

Ron: "That lady never frowns!"

*7*

Hermione to my sister: "I'm splashing water up your boogery nose!"

I love 1st graders! Week 21

About what do you pray? What do you say when you talk to God? Do you only talk to Him when you're sad or angry? Or do you let Him in on the fun when you're happy?

This is a sampling of what our kids said:

This girl is the sweetest

That last one says "Casey and Elizabeth"... us!

This boy wanted to pray for pie, pizza, God, bugs, gold and games.

We went outside in the gorgeous 80 degree (about 27 C) evening to observe the things for which we are grateful.

Besides some ants-in-the-pants issues with one of the kids, it was a good class with a lot of discussion about why we thank God. The "innocence of a child" came to fruition in these sharing sessions.

This innocence became even more prevalent when we read the Passion story from the children's Bible. We learned about Judas and how he betrayed Jesus, even though he was his friend. The class clairvoyant made yet another poignant statement, "I can't believe he would do that to Jesus when he was His friend."

Choking back a severe case of the "Awwww"s, I agreed and told her about the pharisee's reward to Judas for his betrayal.

"I would rather have Jesus than 30 pieces of silver," she said.

Of course, Jesus needed to die so our sins could be forgiven, but we all choose the silver over Jesus on a regular basis.

Abortion is choosing the silver (the life you once foresaw for yourself, which this baby threatens). Taking the job that combats your ethical or moral conscious is choosing the silver. Yelling at or physically abusing someone is choosing the silver. Skipping Mass to go to a concert, to go to a movie, or to sleep in is choosing the silver.

"I would rather have Jesus than 30 pieces of silver," she said. Thirty pieces of silver seems pretty trivial compared to the great banquet.

7 Quick Takes Friday, Volume 22

Click here to read the original post at ConversionDiary.com

Head colds are for losers. This loser's "How to survive a month-long cold:"

*1*

Look at creative pictures a fun dad took of his giggly daughters.

Rights belong to Jason Lee

Don't miss the one about baby pooping faces.

*2*

Overdose on Vitamin C, H2O and echinacea because two weeks from now, you're expected to be perky, smiling, and looking well-rested.

The theme was ARrrgh Matey! meets Luck O' the Irish

I'm a bridesmaid in two weeks! Another good friend of mine is getting married in about two months, so when I saw the title for this post, "It's about the Experience: A Post that Will Probably Be Uninteresting to Those Not Planning Weddings," I was paradoxically intrigued.

This young bride dated her now-husband for 5 years before they got married. They also waited until their wedding day for their first kiss.... whoa. That takes some serious commitment...

She's a Catholic blogger, but she has some interesting disagreements with some of the teachings of the Church. I disagree with her on many points, but if you can't read something you disagree with, you have a hard time getting along with new people.

*3*

Avoid staying up until 1:00am to finish a post about when God V8-smacked you in the forehead.

*4*

In a cloudy state of mind, attempt to do a write-up about how two saints picked you and are now making your worst faults abundantly clear to you. Proceed to confession and Mass.

Reminder: next week's Bright Maiden's post is about our "issues with the Church." Scandalous? Perhaps.

*5*

Watch The Sound of Music for the 470th time with someone who has never seen it before. Launch a thorough Child Services investigation into said person's childhood, looking for other instances of child abuse or neglect.

(I don't own the rights)

Additionally, realize that you no longer want to fast forward through "Something Good" because it's adorable instead of "ew gross, stop kissing."

*6*

Get your blood boiling by reading baby "feminists" grace the world with their misinterpretations and conclusion-jumping.  

This blog written by self-proclaimed "feminists" at my alma mater makes me laugh and angers me at the same time. The writer misconstrued the Catholic Campus Ministry's man-treat that was held last weekend frightfully.

Preview: "Tell me what, is an unmanly world? One with women in it?"

The Man-treat's poster and catalyst for feminist rage

Good grief.

The school newspaper and the blog writer failed to do their homework. The man-treat was to talk to men about an epidemic amongst young men: pornography addiction. Pornography objectifies women; if the newspaper or this blogger had asked questions instead of jumping to conclusions, they might have understood and applauded the effort of this retreat.

Beware: if you click, you will be tempted to comment. Remember to remain composed, unlike one of the male, Catholic commenters who reduced himself to insulting.

*7*

Spend way too many hours cleaning out your inbox... and then admit it to the world. Five thousand unsorted emails are now neatly tucked away in folders. I have totally clean inboxes... until you comment...

Nerd alert!

I love 1st graders! Week 20

Forgiveness and love: two simple words with humongous baggage.

Today we focused on the seventy-times seven times forgiveness rule and saying we're sorry when we hurt someone. At the beginning of class, they were to take a crayon to paper to color around words on the worksheet that related to "forgiveness" or "love."

One of the words was "sin" and every single first grader asked us what that meant. After we explained it to them a few times, it occurred to me that we just opened them up to committing sin... now that they know that doing something they know is wrong is called a "sin," they can't get away with it using the naive card anymore!

I feel like a terrible person now... but in a different way, I'm glad I got to one of the ones to let them in on that definition.

Perhaps I will pop through their mind when they reflect on the word "sin" when they're driving their hover mini vans through the air, fiddling with the flux capacitor and tasting blood in their mouth rather than yelling at their spouse.

My co-teacher and good friend organized a craft for the day: Forgiveness bugs. "Catch the forgiveness bug!" we wrote on their wings. The kids haphazardly marker-ed all over the little egg carton mounds, designing their own breed of "bug."

I forgot to take a picture of one of the completed bugs, but they looked similarly to this:

They were like this, sans legs. Lady bugs don't even have legs...

When the kids were doing that first worksheet activity and coloring the words related to "forgiveness" and "love," one girl spoke up and said, "Oh no, I just circled sin."

"You can erase your sins, don't you know?" said a little boy who looks like Rolfe from Sound of Music, miniature-sized.

Why yes, Rolfe, yes you can. We can erase the grudges we hold against others as well, just catch the forgiveness bug!

7 Quick Takes Friday, Volume 21

Click here to read the original post at ConversionDiary.com

*1*

This week, the Bright Maidens focused on dating and we were humbled by the response, once again! I appreciated support for my commitophobia, which is great because I had already decided to hang on to this quirk :)


This Tuesday we'll discuss our patron saints: how they affect us, why we chose them, who else we have adopted over the years and more. Make sure you don't miss it and LIKE us on Facebook here or over on the right here--->

*2*

I'm officially 24-years-old, even though I've been saying that for over 4 months. Something about 23 sounded off for me, so I skipped ahead a little early. I'm going to regret that in thirty years, I know.

I felt so loved (thank you, friends)!

What did I do for my birthday? All of my brain-saver breaks during the work day were spent looking at pictures of my baby cousins. Are they not the CUTEST?

*3*

Yes, it's a little lame to direct a whole quick take to another post, but I wanted to make sure y'all saw the review for Jason and Crystalina Evert's How to Find Your Soulmate.

The short version of this review is: you should buy it.

*4*

Marc Cardaronella (you think maybe he's Italian?) is a blogger you need to add to your Google Reader. Not only has he been so kind as to plug the Bright Maidens, but he is very active on Twitter and on other blogs.

This week he posted something about a deep fear I have about parenthood titled, "Why Your Kids Won't Stay Catholic." Check it out!

*5*

A few weeks ago, I stumbled across a porn star. Whoops. 

Misleading Easter Bunny has nothing to do with Porn

I found her on Twitter and her story is sad, yet inspirational. Shelley Lubben was in the sex industry for years until she converted both her mind and her heart. 

This former porn star is now married to the son of a Christian pastor and spends her time warning the world of the dangers of this glorified industry.

I feel certain most of the people reading this do not support the porn industry, at least not publicly. 

If anyone who may have stumbled upon this blog because of this misleading picture I posted in this quick take... and you still think pornography is harmless, read some of these first hand accounts from sex industry workers. Warning: short, but graphic descriptions.

*6*

Not that I would intend to inspire jealousy in your hearts... but guess which city Jason Evert will be speaking in next week? That's right, Richmond, Virginia.

I cannot wait!

*7*

I have a confession to make, y'all: I am so vain.

How vain is she? (Yes, I've seen that show)

I'm so vain that I feel the need to get a tan before the April wedding in which I will be a bridesmaid. Look at this picture (goofball me sent this to goofball bride a few months ago) and tell me I don't need a tan in this dress.

I am half-Irish, one-quarter German, and one-quarter Italian. My skin is pinkish olive: not meant to be pale. I'm so vain that I spent an appalling amount of money on a month membership to a tanning bed.

Serves me right, I got a burn today.

I love 1st graders! Week 18

The Ten Commandments: As drawn by 1st graders

1. 1. I am the LORD your God: you shall not have strange Gods before me.

"That guy has two gods."

Zoom if you must.

2. You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain. The girl who looks just like me drew a picture of a guy with a big blob of brown coming out of his mouth. She said he was being pushing into the ground for saying something bad about God.

3. Remember to keep holy the LORD'S Day.

 

Impressive, is it not?

4. Honor your father and your mother. The girl who drew this one included a picture of her bearded father and her mother. I've seen them both, it was fun to see them in cartoon form.

5. You shall not kill. The kids were jumping to be the one to draw this one. It's the one they most easily remembered. Heard in classroom 210: "That's a girl who is burying her friend because she killed her." Nearby the grave was a road sign labeled, "No Killing." Obviously the state should invest in larger signs.

6. You shall not commit adultery. Let's not pretend this wasn't a tough one to explain. My brilliant co-teacher decided we would say this means we should value our relationships and be kind to one another.

7. You shall not steal. 

Yellow robber on the right says, "Let's steal." His friend replies, "No."

8. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor. I half expected to see a grizzly bear on the page, but the student did a good job of explaining lying with crayons.

9. You shall not covet your neighbor's wife. Another tough one... The boy who drew for this one drew two people saying hello and giving each other bombs... My co-teacher made sure he drew a big "No" and pointed to the less than neighborly gift exchange.

10. You shall not covet your neighbor's goods. The boy who drew for this commandment showed two children playing and sharing together. "Thank you for sharing your toys," one said. "Your welsldkfjaljasdf," he replied.

Kids say the darndest things.

Dear Pooh

I haven't stopped laughing since we found my baby sister's journal from her days as a 6-year-old. She only wrote on about 10 pages, unfortunately. I take that back, I would have a hernia right now if she had been a more diligent journal-writer.

The front of the "diary"

Dear Pooh,

Tonight the bizzard stated buy git getting icee a wuel. Jan. 2, 99 Blizzard of 1999.



Oh, we're just getting started.

Dear Pooh,

Today is valentins day I'm pritty icsidid but I'm cinda dicapoitit because I nevr got to do my valintins today. Buy!



That should give you an idea of the Richmond accent, as heard and regurgitated by a 6-year-old.

Dear Pooh,

I am releafed that Elaine is okay. Alex is on our soccer team axsdentlie He kicked the ball into Elaie's face. She got a bloddy nose and I was in goal and I saved the ball with my pinky.



I wonder if Alex really kicked that ball in Elaine's face axsdentlie or not.

Dear Journal,

Rain

Rain is such a funny thing. Too much of it floods, too little of it drought. That's we're going through right now; a drought. Tonight it's powring and it looks as if our coldosack is Lake Michigan. Since its so dark I'm pretty scared.



We lived in a cul-de-sac.

When my parents got home, if I had been wearing black and white I would have looked like a sun-burned penguin. g2g (got to go),

Katie

I love 1st graders! Week 17

A few blurbs from this, the pre-Ash Wednesday 1st grade class:

*"But why do they call it Good Friday when they killed Jesus that day?" -- This is the same girl that sparks almost every 1st grader post I write.

*There is a copy of the Crucifix of San Damiano on the wall in the room.

We start talking about Good Friday and how they hung Jesus on the cross.

Teacher: "Do you know what they put on Jesus' head before they hung Him on the cross?"

1st grade boy having a seizure with arm in the air: "Uh, a... sun... thing?"

* We went into the church to learn about Ash Wednesday and they knew they were going to be crossed with ashes on their forehead. This is the South, not very many of these kids have more than a gas fireplace. The concept of "ashes" is almost foreign to them.

Over heard:
* "They're going to burn paper in church."
* "Are the ashes on my head going to be hot?"
* Teacher: "Does anyone remember which color we use during Lent?" 1st grader: "Black?" Pointing to freshly crossed forehead.
* Teacher: "If we we wanted to draw a drawing to show Easter Sunday, what would we draw?" 1st grader I: "A cave" 1st grader II: "Jesus going up to Heaven." 1st grader III: "A big rock." 1st grader IV: "Jesus, on the cross, inside an Easter egg."

They were really good today and I would love to do a full post about it, but I have to get ready for the BRIGHT MAIDENS series for tomorrow! Remember to click over to Julie's and Trista's blogs for their version of tomorrow's (today, if you're reading this on Tuesday) theme: Are women in the Catholic Church oppressed or repressed?

I love 1st graders! Week 14

You're either in tears, celebrating, or indifferent about the results of last night's game. I'm not going to reveal my stance... but what a cool segue that the first thing Greenbay's Greg Jennings said at the end of the game was "Glory be to God!"

I noticed his prayerful kneeling at the end of each touchdown, which was such a cool affirmation about the lives of some of these players. AND his end of game comment glorifying God brings us right to tonight's lesson! We learned the Glory Be!

The lessons in this book are less than exciting, to say the least. My co-teacher is brilliant and comes up with fun routines. Today I looked up the American Sign Language words for the Glory Be... what an adventure that was:

Glory be to the Father

to the Son,

and to the Holy Spirit,

as it was in the beginning,

is now, and will be forever.

Amen.

I don't usually get to share helpful things with moms readers, but this is really fun! This one is for Spence Ohana who also teaches CCD. Maybe you can use this!

The kids BLEW ME AWAY with how fast they picked it up and they seemed to enjoy it! They were so quick, they could return to their seats and start filling out "kindness coupon books" that my friend and co-teacher made.

"This coupon is good for one hug."

"I will help you with the dishes."

"I will help my mom make her bed."

Several munchkins said they would make dinner... let's hope mom and dad avoid using that coupon. Ovens are tricky.

A superb weekly reminder is that these kids really retain what they learn and what we discuss. They ask questions and genuinely want to know answers.

"...but Jesus said, 'Let the children come to me, and do not prevent them; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.'" (Matthew 19:14)

It makes more sense to me each week.

Mass-ive disruption

Yes, those kids have been running around throughout the entire opening prayer. I think one of them is wearing tap shoes. Yup, that's them again, doing a jig, as it seems, in... no, on the back row.

This has happened during Mass in a pew just far enough away from you to pique your interest. You've felt the event going on behind you bore a hole in the back of your head. It wanted you to look at it.

Chances are those moms and dads who hear kids playing in the background sympathize with the parents of the noise-makers, but sometimes they just can't help shedding a little attention on the free show. Most parents, at one point, have tried to keep their kids from bunny hopping in circles around the stroller during a funeral (I truly hope this has never occurred), so they know the seesaw of stress:

• Stop it! People are staring!
• Let them stare, they have no idea!
• Oh my gosh, I can't believe my kids are doing this to me.
• They're kids, this is what they do.
• I need a nap.

At the beginning of a recent Mass, a family of 233 kids started frolicking in the back. I think they were setting up a carnival, or at least a Skeeball machine.

Another from the visual diary

We, the crowd, divided between those-who-shall-ignore-and-never-look (my peeps) and those-who-will-look-if-they-damn-well-please, while the poor mother was doing her best to wrangle her children back onto the bench. There were probably only 3 kids, but that's a guess. Remember, my anxiety prevented me from turning around.

I started getting irrationally upset at the people who turned around to shoot the death stare with their irrationally upset eyes. Then I realized: this is pointless and I've completely missed the beginning of the hour of devotion.

To those who turn around and investigate "the problem:" Think about what you're doing. You're annoyed by the kids or by the kids' parents because YOU can't concentrate.

Kids make noise. If you haven't picked up on this, I doubt you can even hear the disruption to begin with, so why are we having this discussion? (Elizabeth, stop talking to yourself)

Secondly, when was the last time of complete quiet in you life? When will there ever be a time of quiet? When, other than in childhood, have you been able to live life without interruption?

There will always be someone within the speaking hall with Tourette's, someone at church who will mess up the Eucharist line because they don't know any better, someone who wants to drive a wedge between you and your faith, someone who is shaking his paper cup filled with coins at you as if to say, "Hello? Can't you hear me?," someone on the phone in the highway lane next to you, and some kid distracting you from your prayer life.

To those who get mad at those who look: you're no better and you're still letting judgment cloud your present mind.

Tie your happiness and your patience to Jesus Christ. Center yourself in the midst of the distractions. It's not God's job or any person's job to clear your mind for you. That's your job. Look at yourself.

I love 1st graders! Week 6

A great friend of mine from college called me up a few weeks ago to ask if I wanted to help teach a class of 1st graders (say it with me, awwwwwwwwwwww) for religious education at our church. YES! Of course, I'd love to!

Well, they sure were cute, harmless, tiny little people on the first day, but they intimidated me. We all know the real story: I intimidated myself. I have led the Vacation Bible School activities station for years, thus I have seen ADD/ADHD and BOY at their worst in the most freeing environment. "We're outside, why not?" "Because if you pop that balloon over her head, she will get all wet." "Fine, I'll save it for later."

Sheesh. I loved that too, I just needed to find my balance in the chaos.

In this class, we're forcing these kids to "go to school" for an extra hour and a half after the last school bell rang for the day. They just had dinner, they don't know anyone in the class and they don't have any of the prayers memorized yet. I think that formula inspires ADHD in every 6-year-old in America.

Despite my anxiety hiccups on the first day, I loosened up, I'm having fun, and I've received the best compliment a non-teacher-teacher can receive: when we sit in a circle on the floor, there are always a few requests to sit next to them. When we pick our spots, I get cuddled and hugged as I read and ask them questions. Talk about warm fuzzies!

Now that you have some background - Week 6

This is me... not a very recent photo, but am I not adorable?

There is one girl in my class who looks EXACTLY like I did as a 6-year-old, spooky. When her dad picks her up at the end of the day, I fight the urge to say, "If you're wondering what she'll look like in 17 years, I can pose for a picture." She's a really neat kid (I'll call her Grace). Grace is always enthusiastic when telling a story, she wants feedback on her drawings, but doesn't ask for it. She is really friendly, though she joined our class in the 4th week, when friendships had started to form. Grace is exactly the kind of kid I want to have someday.


The Bible story of the day was Jesus inviting the children to come listen to him and telling the grown ups that they could learn a thing or two from kids like Grace. We did a skit. THAT was an adventure in child psychology. Some were outgoing, but acted like they had a camera on them. Others were just smiley and quiet.

Grace's reaction broke my heart. She was supposed to ask Jesus some questions that she had practiced. When we were all performing, her hands came up to her face and her eyes opened wide, letting the white show around the corners. When we looked to her to ask Jesus about loving others and being kind, she shook her head and mumbled in a high pitch. Poor Grace's stage fright was twisting her mind into a panic, so we quickly moved on.

After the play, she was cuddly, normal and cool-Grace-like, having waved the play (and the fear) goodbye for the day. It struck me as especially pertinent for the lesson.

Jesus asks us to be like children, to breathe in the world the way they do. Grace has either made the switch through the age of reason and feels the same anxiety jellyfish the rest of us do, or her reaction gives us insight in another child-like behavior. When I face something with which I am not comfortable (performing on my kickball team is spiking my anxiety, lately), I put up some version of Grace's hands on my face. I can chose to overreact, curse when I mess up, or start beating myself up. OR I can chose to have my little panic and move on, be cuddly and Grace-cool when the game ends.

One month until freedom.

A four year old lives in me and she hates Halloween. Every year I remind her that it can be a great holiday for expressing creativity, for finding new activities to do with friends, and that CANDY seems to be the biggest theme of All Hallow’s Eve. She cannot be comforted and I don’t blame her.

I was young, probably four, when Halloween found a spot on my blacklist. I know now that my dad was volunteering with a haunted house project that tried to scare kids away from using drugs (I don’t follow the logic on that...) that year. He needed to check up on something on site, or he was just excited to show me on what he had worked.

SCARED/SCARRED for life! The ghoul sounds, the cold darkness, the screams, the creepy laughing and loud noises run on a loop when I review that memory every Halloween. Never have I understood why people enjoy scary movies and my soul aches when Halloween noises cross my ears.

The stores were practically orange back in August and we’re only one more month away from a Halloween sale blow out. I’ll enjoy the autumn and ease into the chillier days, but I will not indulge in the one holiday I wish I could sleep through.